I break bad! … In my mind.

(Making blogging into a daily — okay, if not daily, then “often enough” — habit; and that as long as I have something to write, hot damn, I’ll write!)

Today’s prompt from The Daily Post is:

Fearless Fantasies
How would your life be different if you were incapable of feeling fear? Would your life be better or worse than it is now?

The immediate feeling I got with that thought is, ironically, that of vertigo; or that feeling when you’re at highest point on a roller coaster and you anticipate that heart-stopping drop.

I fear the thought of being fearless; I fear the thought of what I’d do.

Thinking cat is thinking

… though, actually, not really, I mean, I WOULD stuff cat food into my pockets and attract all sorts of felines; fleas an allergies be damned. (Source: reddit)


My fears are classified in two groups: the external factors (ones that I can’t control, such other people, inanimate objects, the dark), and the internal factors — the ones that depend on me.  Between the two, I fear the latter more.

Taking this “fearless” thought however, let’s say that I fear absolutely nothing, and no one, not even myself.  Let’s take it further into having no inhibitions whatsoever.  I fear because I know that someone or something can bring me (and the ones I love) all kinds of harm and I just flat out do not like it.

I don’t think my life would be any better.  I actually believe that I’m in a good place, and being incapable of feeling fear would give my life a turn for the worse — Cielo breaking bad!  I’ll be the most confrontational and aggressive person, inhibitions and repercussions be damned.  I’ll just keep on ramming against one head after the other, repercussion upon repercussions, until I expire or until the world goes up in flames — whichever comes first.

The image I paint is that of an extreme, veering towards violence and pain.  One can argue that fearlessness can be used to pursue personal happiness; I say that fearlessness will give life the sharpest contrast of black and white in which your ultimate happiness is pitted against that of the person in front of you, and I’ll bet that your standards of happiness will be far from similar.

Things that people commonly fear are emotional pain, bodily harm, the loss of income, death.  Without these we’d all be crossing the street at the red light, driving past speed limits, and screaming “YOLO!!” at the top of our lungs.

I believe that we “fear” because we anticipate.  We are capable of looking at a future, regardless if our vision is bright or bleak.  If it’s a bright one, one can fear the little things that would prevent you from reaching that point; if it’s bleak, you fear that you might not turn it into a bright one at all.  We fear, because we care.  It’s not just about ourselves — we have our loved ones, our livelihoods.

So, I’ll keep my fear — just enough to keep me sane, grounded, and happy.

Comfy cat

… like this.
(Source: Linda Grimes)



About Cielo

I am a paper-pusher by day, a log by night, an aspiring singer-dancer and a wannabe artist in-between. I am also a Professional Space Cadet.
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3 Responses to I break bad! … In my mind.

  1. Pingback: Meditation: An important aspect of our daily routine | Harmony 'n' Solace

  2. Espoir says:

    I believe that people generalize fear too much. They say that it causes the hiccups in our life and overall is a big factor in ruining it.

    Yes, it’s true that fear can do those things, but it is also fear that can help us chase down what we want. It helps us treasure things and take them to heart. Like Death itself, Fear is merely a reminder as well 🙂 Kudos for keeping fear in your heart, ate ^_^

    PS Love the cats 😀

    • Cielo says:

      Thanks for your comment, Espoir |D♥ ! I like your take in looking at fear, too. It’s one of those things in life that carry a silver lining — yes, we’re encouraged to fearless, but not reckless.

      Fear and pain give us wisdom and, I agree with you, makes us appreciate what’s on the other side of the fence; that when we overcome fear, the rewards are great, and we know that we deserve what we come to hold.

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